Baby Fever

Let me start off by saying there is NO way I will be having a baby anytime soon, so don't get your hopes up quite yet (or worry, depending on who is reading this).

Maybe it is the result of me being surrounded by the mothers with their infants who, like me, walk around all day shopping, sitting at coffeeshops, etc. Or maybe it is daytime TV trying to sell me information about raising my baby. Or, maybe it is because I am in my prime baby making years and my hormones can't help it.

Whatever it is, I'm obsessed. I watched this wonderful documentary made by Ricki Lake the other day called The Business of Being Born. I was sobbing, watching these women have their babies and marveling at how strong these women are, whether they had their babies at home or in the hospital. Amazing. I also spent yesterday reading the Heather Armstrong's blog Dooce archives about her pregnancy experiences and her committal with postpartum depression. Also very intense.

This baby fever has also translated to me wanting a dog. Let me just say, while I am definitely an animal lover I am not a dog person. I don't desire to pick up poop or listen to whining or to be followed around, but I do like the idea of going for walks, teaching it tricks, and snuggling with a big doggie. I'm especially attracted to Wheaten Terriers. They are like giant stuffed animals!! Anyway, I'm not getting a dog either. I think I am just wishing for something to take care of and the cats are just not doing it for me right now.

I have to keep reminding myself that I should be taking care of myself by a) finding a job, b) fulfilling my dream of living in Oregon with Frenchie, and c) being more healthy. That should be enough to focus on, but I still feel like I'm looking for something else.